While chatting with my friend a few weeks ago, I asked her what her son (who is the same age as mine) is getting for Christmas. I won't repeat what my verbal reaction was to her response of, "a laptop. That's his big gift". Good grief, I should certainly hope so.
Every evening we listen to "Letters from Santa" on the radio, and it astounds me what children are asking for this year. Instead of dolls and trucks, the kids wanted digital cameras, four-wheelers, cell phones, and "a Wii". A Nintendo Wii is a video gaming system that costs almost $400, and that's not including games or extra controllers, which are also very pricey.
Another friend of mine was supposed to come over for lunch last week since she was going to be in town shopping. She called that morning to cancel, and said she wasn't coming after all, since her loan wouldn't be processed until the following day. Huh? I came to find out the woman was borrowing $2000 from the bank in order to buy presents.
Yesterday I was picking up a lay-away, and there was a young woman in line ahead of me. When the sales associate emerged from the back room, she and two other workers were carrying more boxes than I could shake a stick at. It was a sea of pink - all toys for little girls, from Easy Bake Ovens to Barbies to Hanna Montana swag. I couldn't help but be curious as to how much this woman's order was going to cost, especially when she needed three carts to hold it all. I'll cop to bending my ear slightly to hear the cashier tally up the toys, and I'll also cop to nearly wetting my pants when she said $948. Be still my heart. At this point I couldn't resist; "How many kids do you have," I asked her. Her answer: two. In case you're interested, that's $474 per. And that's just from one store.
The breaking point for me was last night, when I found myself wrapping presents for my dog, Bear MacDonald. Me! Wrapping dog presents! What has happened to us?
Many years ago, kids were thrilled to wake up Christmas morning to see a present under the tree. Present, singular. I doubt in the days of the Great Depression that folks were spending the equivalent of a mortgage payment on their children.
As a matter of fact, Christmas, as a holiday, has undergone a complete transformation in the years since our grandparents were young. It used to be a time for celebrating the religious aspects of December 25th, of being with family, and enjoying a nice meal if you were lucky. Gifts have always been part of the deal, I suppose, but back in the day they were of secondary importance to attending mass and celebrating family.
I'm not suggesting you should burn your tree and head to church, but one thing I have realized, after years of trying to "keep up with the Clauses", is that the best parts of Christmas have nothing to do with presents. When I walk into the mall the third week in October and see holly and chocolates everywhere, it automatically makes me cranky. Shopping has turned into hysteria, and the stress involved in making a list, roaming the stores for hours, people bumping into your cart, kids screaming - that's not fun or festive. Neither is having kids tear open wrapping paper, glance at a toy, and toss it aside to get to the next one.
I like to watch Christmas Daddies on television. I enjoy decorating my house and putting up the Christmas tree (in December, not the day after Halloween). I love to see my kids' excitement when they open their gifts, like anyone else.
However, I refuse to put myself in the hole for the sake of being able to tell my friends about the insane amount of money I spent on gifts. When the wrapping paper is cleaned up and the turkey is gone, the bills still roll in. Does it mean I love my kids any less because I don't spend as much as other parents do? No, not at all. The kids are just as happy to open something that cost $5 as they would be to open something that cost $40.
It's parents who take Christmas to the point of excess, not children. We're setting a dangerous precedent by trying to outdo one another and make each Christmas bigger and better than the one before.
I should mention, the presents for Bear MacDonald were a bone, a ball, and a bag of Snausages, purchased for about $6, at the repeated request of my children. I consider it proof that Christmas doesn't have to cost a fortune to make kids happy.
I would have to agree with you..what happen to christmas, I have been trying to teach my boys the real meaning of Christmas, and I really think they understand..When my boys wrote their letters this year I was very proud of them, they each asked for 2 things only, lego and a movie, but after asking they said to Santa please make sure the children that dont have much get their stuff first as we have lots of cool stuff. It just makes my head spin, when I think of what parents do now a days to put stuff under the tree, I write the responds to Santa letters and am shocked at what kids ask for each year it gets worst..I have been doing this now for 10 years, This year I got a letter 4 pages long, and the first paragraph was "Dear Santa, This is what I want..and please make sure I have it all under the tree or I will be very upset....then it starts with 31/2 pages of stuff they want...everything from a four wheeler, to laptops, computer games, designer clothes etc...etc..what happen to Christmas??? It was a very hard to response to that letter...but I did..
ReplyDeleteI asked my boys last week to write out what christmas was all about to them..I was so impressed with them it made me cry..I realize all my hard work was paying off..My oldest wrote that his favourite part was going to his great grandmother for christmas eve, and attending midnite mass with his family..he also wrote he enjoyed playing secret santa on our street(we deliver a little surprise each year to our neighbour's and put on the tag from (street name) elf..and deliver them just before christmas at midnite, the boys are now doing it and love doing it). My youngest said his favourite was christmas dinner and playing with all his family, and going to see the nativity scene at the church. He also likes when we go to the cememtary to decorate his grandfather tree so that everyone can enjoy it..So I guess I must be doing something right...I stick to a budget and always seem to have money on boxing day...and my children always have a wonderful smile on Christmas morning without laptops...and expensive gifts.
It just makes me shake my head when I hear mothers going on about letting their bills get behind in dec. to make sure their kids get everything they want.."what about a roof over thier head or heat???" I was at a store the other day waiting in the line up picking up a few grocery to make cookies for a friend and got talking to a mother she was going on about being so stressed out and wasnt sure what she was going to do, I asked why was she so stressed..she continue to tell me she had spent at least 3500.00 on Christmas already and wasnt even near done...she had 2 kids...I must of had a very strange/shock look on my face because she said to me oh is that alot of money..I just looked and shaked my head oh yah...my limit is 1000.00(which I save the whole year) and I have a big family...she goes oh I couldnt do that, my girls need special clothes(one is 1 and the other is 4)I asked what are special clothes, well they have to be name brands..come on does a 4 year old know what is name brands??? I dont think..
Come on people lets get the real meaning back to Christmas!!
Sorry for venting but what are we really doing to our children??